Short Film Script Development Notes.

Development Notes:

My call with Jane Marlow was very helpful for the development of my second draft. An overall very nice amount of positive feedback, I received notes that the elements of Humor, depiction of teenage stress and friendship were very well done and had a grounded yet whacky element to them . The main thing I have been told to develop a bit more is the scene in which Laci starts to try and figure out who stole her drumsticks, the overall feedback was that she didn't have to have a whole monologue in her head and spell it out for the audience, it also felt very out of place with the established tone and style. The rule of "show don't tell" was mentioned. We discussed an alternative way to go about doing this scene which was to have Laci bump into the characters on her way out of the building and having these realizations so we are in the same position as her, But overall very useful and positive feedback. I thank Jane once more.

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